Be Merry.

Unbearable.

It's just so sad.  Cold, lingering, unshakable grief weighs heavy on my heart for all the children, 20 children,  who lives were lost in such a horrific act of violence. Now that Finley is in my life, I can't help but picture myself in the parents' shoes who lost their children today. The parents who's babies didn't make it out of that school. Just the thought of it is a pain so intense, a grief so deep, a sadness so unbearable.

Letters to Finley: Kairos

Being a mom, your mom, is better than I expected. I have dreamed of what it would be like to be a mom since I was old enough to carry a doll and I carried around (dolls longer than most girls), but it is so much better than I could have ever make believed.  Today, I was carrying you around the grocery store trying to do a little speed shopping and all of sudden you just grabbed my cheeks with both of your hands and pulled my face to yours and laughed and laughed and laughed. I stopped right in the middle of the produce section and had a laugh fest with you. We must have looked pretty funny with our foreheads smooched together cracking up.

It's these moments, these simple moments that catch me off guard that I am so deeply grateful for. 

Letters to Finley: 7 months

The days are long the months are short.  You continue to bloom and grow.  This was a busy month, full of firsts.  We flew to Kentucky and Grams and Captain took you to the aquarium   You loved the penguins.You learned to clap and are pretty proud of it. You started sitting in a highchair at restaurants and you are pretty proud of that too. You love servers and get a lot of attention from the waitstaff.  You are famous at a few restaurants around town.  They whisper "she's here" when you come through the door and the whole staff swings by our table to say hello. You greet them with your grins and dimples. You're pretty easy to fall in love with and have lots of fans. You went swimming for the first time and turns out you're a fish just like your dad and I.  You splashed and kicked.  I was amazed how relaxed you were in the water.  You would put your head on my shoulder and just lie and float. Your chatter has become more pronounced.  You can say dada, mama, and baba, but not necessarily with meaning or purpose.  You like to hear yourself talk, I like to hear you talk too and we have the best nonsensical conversations. Everyday that goes by I love you more, I'm not sure how that is even possible, but it's true.

XOXO,
Momma

Letters to Finley: To the moon!!!

You love to swing. LOVE IT. It might be your favorite thing ever and watching you swing might be my favorite thing ever! Well at least my favorite thing ever right now. Your beaming face sends warm fuzzys shooting through my heart. You squeal, giggle, flap your arms (your version of clapping) and wiggle your chubby legs. I love watching you experience new things, especially things that make you crazy-squealey-happy! 

A thousand times thankful for her

For her tiny toes. Her little nose. Her chubby cheeks. Her big bright eyes. Her long eye lashes. Her laugh. Her hand wrapped around our fingers. Her endless babble and slobbery grin. Her tiny tooth. Her sweet milky breath and her baby fresh smell. Her curiousness, her stubbornness, her cheerfulness.  Her cuddles, her tears. Her ability to light up our day, everyday. We are a thousand times thankful for her.

We had a quiet Thanksgiving just the three of us.  I made french toast and bacon for breakfast and then we watched the Macy's Day parade snuggled on the couch with quilts, coffee and a ba (bottle).  We took a walk to the park so Fin could swing.  That girl loves to swing! Then I cooked a traditional Thanksgiving dinner: green bean casserole (my specialty), mashed potatoes and gravy, stuffing, cranberry sauce (from the can, best kind right!?), pumpkin pie and of course turkey (pre-ordered and delivered, maybe next year I'll tackle the bird....)  It was a little strange not to be home surrounded by family, but I was proud of us for taking the time to celebrate, to start traditions, and to give thanks.

Letters to Finley: Election Day

Obama was president on the day you were born.  He was the first African American President of the United States.  He represents change, progress and a renewed sense of hope. He stands for the people and by the people, all people.  You were born on an election year. And today the country had a decision to make, the choice was to standby the message of change and hope or try something new.  Your dad and I followed the candidates very closely, there are a lot of issues, there are a lot of ideas and opinions, and it can get pretty complicated and confusing.  We listened, we learned, and we went with what we felt is best for all, not just ourselves. We stood on the side of love. We believe in acting unselfishly and helping those who need it most.  We believe in equality for all and we believe you should always “leave it better than you found it” and that is why we waited with you in the cold and rain early this morning for over an hour to support Obama.  Obama was the president when you were born and I happy to say he still is.

Letters to Finley: Super Sweet Super Finley!

I searched and searched for the perfect costume for you.  There are surprisingly A LOT of options for babies,they range from unoriginal-predictable to ridiculously-random. I found everything from pumpkins and princesses to sushi and snowmen. But, I wanted something special for you, I wanted something that fit your personality and when I found this, I knew, this costume,this costume was perfect for you! We aren't raising a princess, we are raising a super hero, well okay maybe a princess-super hero. (Those are the best kind of heroes anyway.) 

Three weeks in three thousand words or less...

Last weekend we went to Atlanta (for work), the weekend before that we went to Charleston (for fun) and this week we have had family in town (for bonding). This weekend we are taking a nap (for realz). All good stuff!

Here are a few highlights from the past few weeks.

    

Charleston Pumpkin patch:
I love fall,  I mean really who doesn't? But, Fall in the south is weird.  It is not very Fall like.  It is hot. The leaves do not change colors or fall and if you aren't paying attention to the door decorations, you may just miss it. Thank goodness for pumpkin patches! Pumpkin patches are like the one stop shop for all your fall festive feeling needs.  They bring the fall to the fall less! Pumpkins, cider, hayrides, goats, apple butter, those weird corn stock things, and mums, lots and lots of mums. I was so excited to take Finley to the pumpkin patch.  She is only six months old, but I love watching her experience new things, new things like goats and giant orange vegetables, or are pumpkins fruit? gourds?, well whatever.  We stuffed/dressed Finley in a pumpkin shirt, Halloween tutu, and matching stripe tights and went to a pumpkin patch in Charleston. It was 100 degrees out and turns out the pumpkin patch was right on the side of a busy road,  not quite the fall farm scene I had pictured, but it was sufficient. Most of the attractions were for kids 2+, but that didn’t stop us from waking Finley up from her nap and over enthusiastically parading her around to see the goats, the bunnies, the scarecrows and the PUMPKINS! We will definitely continue this tradition. Here are a few pictures, I wish I could have taken more, but Finley was just learning to sit up, so Brian was close by squatting down in catch-her position and Finley, well Finley was more interested in the eating hay then posing for the camera:

 

Atlanta:
Every once in a while I have to travel to Atlanta for work.  It is only about 4 hours away, so it is a nice weekend trip.  Brian always comes with.  I work all day Saturday, but Sunday we sleep in, go to brunch, and stroll through stores.  This was the first trip to Atlanta with Finley and since I was working the majority of the time, that meant Brian was on baby duty.  It is really crazy to me how far we have come as parents in six months.  I mean when we first brought Finley home just the thought of having to get Fin in and out of the carseat and packing the diaper bag with all the “how to survive in the wild” necessities, was enough to keep us home.  But now we bounce all over the place with The Fin in tow and while it works best when we can tag team baby girl together, we both feel confident enough to take her on alone.

Brian drove Finley up to Atlanta by himself, I had to ride the bus with a group I was hosting....  Everything went great, she slept.  All was well until Brian had to stop to use the restroom. How does one go to the bathroom at a gas station with a baby girl in tow? He didn’t know, so he just didn’t go.  I didn’t know what to tell him, I still haven’t figure out the answer.  If you know please share.
I met up with them at the hotel.  We love hotel rooms. We love the BIG BIG beds. We love room service.  We love watching tv (in bed) and not having to think about the dishes in the sink or the laundry in the dyer. We love forced relaxation!

Family:
We are so lucky to have families willing to travel so far to come spend time with us! 9 hours for my mom and 900 hours for Brian's mom and dad.  It is always so good to have them here and we wished they lived closer, like across the street closer. Maybe someday. Here are some of my favorite moments from the past two weeks:

Chalkboard!:

Making this chalkboard in my dining room with my mom.  My mom is super handy and has taught me all she knows.  Together we can make some pretty cool things.  We are a great DIY duo! I am so in love with my new HUGE chalkboard and I am so lucky to have a mom who helps me execute all my crazy ideas, all of them....

Playing with Grams:
Finley was pretty sick while Grams was here, she wasn't her giggly goofy self, but Grams got her laughing a few times.  

The Jewish food festival:

The weather was perfect and the food was amazing! Vendors lined the sidewalks in Forsyth Park and we strolled through sampling all sorts of crazy delicious food. I wasn't sure if I liked corn beef before the festival, now I know I do! 

Speaking of food...

Between my mom and Brian's mom were really spoiled.  It was amazing to come home to dinner each night and we will be eating off of the frozen leftovers in my freezer for the next month! Thanks moms!

The Hurst Ghost Tour:

It was cold, it was dark and it was just scary enough.  Finley stayed awake for most of it, I guess that was the scariest part. I kept waiting for her to start screaming (from being tired, ghosts stories don't phase her), but she didn't make a sound, she just looked around, curious eyes wide open.  We didn't see any ghosts, and for that I am grateful. 

Finley's naps:

Finley has Grandma Jackie just were she wants her to be and the is holding on to her.  Finley figured out that pretty quick how to convince Grandma J. that she needed to be held 90% of the time and most definitely at nap time.  I came home one day to find Jackie rocking Fin, apparently she had been doing so for two hours while that little stinker slept, but it made me so happy to find them snuggling together. Finley is only going to be little once, why should she have to sleep anywhere but on a lap? She has the rest of her life to sleep in a bed. 

Life's been busy, I don't see it slowing down anytime soon, but I can't think of a better kind of busy to be, than busy with family! 

Letters to Finley: 1/2 dozen months

*Little late on this one, but technically she is still six months....

I still have those moments, those moments where I just sit and stare at you and can’t believe that you are really mine.  I have enjoyed every minute of being your mom, every. single. one.  My favorite time of day is when I get to go pick you up from daycare.  You give me the biggest smiles and even though you don’t quite understand hugs, you reach for my cheeks, grab my hair and rub your slobbery, gummy, smile all over my face. It’s the best.You started to say MaMa Mamama MamaMAAMAMAma mamaMa, so far it only comes in the form of a whine and really isn't necessarily directed at me, but it is my favorite sound in the whole world, I have never heard anything sweeter in my life.You love people.  You smile with your mouth wide open at everyone you meet, making them feel extra special.You are sitting up independently, although you prefer to stand and now that you have discovered sitting and standing with assistance, you have declared that tummy time is for the birds. You want to be up, you want to be moving, and you prefer for someone to dance and sing to you at all times.You are a busy bee always reaching, twisting, talking, giggling and bouncing.  You resist sleep, (just like your dad) and literally collapse in my arms at the end of the day.  

So many of my smiles belong to you.

XOXO

Momma