Be Merry.

Unbearable.

It's just so sad.  Cold, lingering, unshakable grief weighs heavy on my heart for all the children, 20 children,  who lives were lost in such a horrific act of violence. Now that Finley is in my life, I can't help but picture myself in the parents' shoes who lost their children today. The parents who's babies didn't make it out of that school. Just the thought of it is a pain so intense, a grief so deep, a sadness so unbearable.

Letters to Finley: Kairos

Being a mom, your mom, is better than I expected. I have dreamed of what it would be like to be a mom since I was old enough to carry a doll and I carried around (dolls longer than most girls), but it is so much better than I could have ever make believed.  Today, I was carrying you around the grocery store trying to do a little speed shopping and all of sudden you just grabbed my cheeks with both of your hands and pulled my face to yours and laughed and laughed and laughed. I stopped right in the middle of the produce section and had a laugh fest with you. We must have looked pretty funny with our foreheads smooched together cracking up.

It's these moments, these simple moments that catch me off guard that I am so deeply grateful for.